Keeping up with the Jones'

Have you seen the new INStyle magazine? Beautiful Sandra Bullock is on the cover...while a lot of BULL$#!? lies within. How is this magazine in the regular grocery stores for regular women like me to buy when the pages are saturated with things we cannot afford? Even in the "Deals and Steals" section, they show a pair of shoes for $169 and a clutch evening bag for $168. Get real, people! Even if I had somewhere to bring a teeny tiny metallic purse (try fitting diapers and a sippy cup in there) my husband would kill me if I bought one. I love the style ideas, but who can actually afford this stuff, especially in this economy?

In our neighborhood, the idea of luxury you cannot really afford is encouraged. People are in serious up-to-the-eyeballs debt. I know folks making minimum payments and paying just finance charges so they can have a certain lifestyle, but more poignantly, the LOOK of a certain lifestyle. Pride be damned, I would much rather spend our hand-to-mouth earnings on just that: what goes in our mouth.

The last time we went our for dinner, I had buyer's remorse. It was Valentine's day and I had serious expectations about how wonderful the night would be. We went through the hassle of getting a sitter, getting the kids all ready and doing the ten million things needed to set them up while we are away (how easy it must be for Brad and Angelina to just leave their staff with the kids). I wore an old dress that I had never worn. I borrowed accessories from a friend and was totally pleased with my cheap-chic look. We went to a place which was nice, but there were no prices on the menu. I guess it goes back to the old saying: if you have to ask the price, you probably cannot afford it. Well, after some pretty good food that came in very small portions, our bill came out to $300. ??????!!!!!

So what IS the lifestyle I want here. I love shopping, I love eating out, and I love feeling like I am splurging on myself every now and then. But...I would rather have spaghetti at home in my Target-bought sweatpants that go into debt. The leather Gucci bags and trips to fancy restaurants will have to belong to the stars in InStyle and the other people in my neighborhood.

It's almost 3pm.....

This is when things get rolling again in the household. The baby, now 14 months old and no longer breastfeeding (yippie!) is stirring from her very short nap. My children seem to be the ones you hear and read about that simply don't sleep. And yes, I have let them "cry it out" enough to know that if a baby doesn't want to sleep, she's not gonna sleep. Anyway...the first grader is going to be home within the hour and then the crazy starts. The backpack will have to be searched, the folder signed, the homework sorted, the snack consumed, the karate uniform donned and out the door we go. I used to dread this, but now I look at it as an opportunity to leave the little one behind with dad (so what if he's worked hard all day at his blue-collar job and just wants to unwind and watch Judge Judy on DVR, tough!).

Then when we get back...poof! Five O'Clock. Mom time. Dad must keep the kids out of the way while I put all of my food network knowledge to use, have a glass of chardonnay, and call a friend. Does this always happen? No. Do I often end up scrubbing someones hair instead? Yup. My end goal is to get everyone around the table, every night (yes, every night) to eat a home-cooked meal. Sometimes, well, lots of times I make what is affectionately referred to as a "bad dinner". Wait, hold on a minute! Did I go to two Universities, an artsy boarding school and earn a handful of degrees to make "bad dinners"???? Apparently so. My choice, I know, but sometimes I cannot believe the mental sacrifices we make to "stay-at-home" with our young ones. What is that term about anyway? I'm doing too much ferrying to carry that label.

My sanctuary is a clean home, bathed children, a glass of chardonnay in my hand (and usually a telephone in the other) and dinner on the stove. A "good" dinner which is healthy, sensible, delicious, gourmet AND kid friendly. HA! Right. I can try though, I can try.